Loving Yourself When Society Tells You Not To

I don’t think there has ever been a time in my life that I was under a size five. I’m almost positive that I went from a children’s size XL to a woman’s size 5 to a 14/16. Im twenty three years old. I could eat better, and I’m working on it. I make sure to exercise once a day, I try to make healthier choices more so than not. But, no matter what I do, I’ll always be curvy, ill never be “skinny”, and I’ve accepted that, now. But, imagine how confusing it was for me as a child to not understand why I couldn’t wear the clothes my friends were wearing. Imagine how hard it was for me to go to school and get called fat, gross, ugly whenever anyone didn’t agree with me, no matter what the argument was about, that was always the first jab. Hearing from guys “wow, Taylor would be so pretty if she lost some weight”, and when I did lose some weight after high school, the messages I would get about how good I looked from guys who never paid attention to me before were disturbing. I never let people see that those negative and insensitive comments bothered me, but they still haunt me from time to time.  The worst part is, looking back at photos of myself in school, I would KILL for that body now. But, because of society and social media and the way it portrays the female body, I spent all of those years hating myself instead.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not looking for pity here. I was also a mean girl. People may have said things that hurt me, but I know I’ve hurt people.

We see articles online, in magazines & newspapers that display a certain mold that people need to fit in, in order to be admired and accepted. And if somebody has an imperfection that does not fit into the mold, they aren’t good enough. But why is that?  Social media, one of the easiest ways to view other peoples opinions (wanted or not). It has the capability and potential to be so positive, however there is a ton of negativity on platforms such as Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Reddit, etc. People are hated because of their race, religion, income, weight, hair colour, they are hated for pretty much everything.

I follow SO many body positivity accounts on Instagram, therefore, my explore page is filled with all kinds of body types. The other day, there was a picture of my favourite model, Ashley Graham in a bathing suit, I thought it was a great picture. Then, I read the comments. The majority of the comments were all things I’ve personally heard before.

“Look at that cellulite, so gross”

“she would be so pretty if she lost weight”

You get the drift.

WHY? WHY? WHY? Why does your opinion on a body that IS NOT your own matter? WHY do we need to associate a number on a pair of pants with being negative? WHY do we let social media mess with the way we see other people. THERE IS NO NEED FOR IT.

Self love and respect is one of the healthiest ways to deal with the negativity that is thrown everybody’s way on a day to day basis. You need to love yourself. That does not mean that you don’t need to change, if you are not healthy, you should do what it takes to get you there. Workout, eat healthy, see your doctor, whatever you have to do. I am in no means trying to glamorize an unhealthy lifestyle. If you need to make changes, you can recognize that but continue to love yourself in the mean time. While you are doing that, think about all of the things you say to yourself about yourself on a daily basis.


Be positive, you will notice a glow from within you over time. I don’t love everything about myself, but I’m learning to accept things on my body that I would not have before, I’m learning on how to grow as a person. I’ve learned on this journey that unless you love yourself, loving anyone or anything else is not easy.




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